Reply to if you're a "no divorce expect with abuse / cheating" person

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]How would it negatively impact your kids if he's already a deadbeat while living with them? A divorce might be the best thing for your kids, let's be real. [/quote]

The way he typically interacts is he's "great super fun dad!!" for a little bit until he's "overwhelmed" (or just tired of it from my perspective) and has to actually parent - like get them ready to leave the house or just deal with their noise and energy when you're over it.  Then he checks out - sometimes for the rest of the day "to protect everyone from how triggered I am" and sometimes will try again several hours later.  If he's not able to check out (i'd used to fight it, now I just let him go without pushing at all) he'll react with a lot of anger and cause everyones mood to spiral.

So from the kids perspective, they love him and have fun with him - though probably feel his mood is unpredictable and he's not dependable.  But I'm dependable so they turn to me for everything.  I think its still better to have their dad in their life versus a dad that they'll always wonder why completely checked out after divorce, but don't know that for sure[/quote]

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