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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Be forewarned that sometimes siblings expect the other sibling to do these things for free. Talk about it up front. Really, though it's easier if she is in a memory care where they are trained to deal even if the decline gets bad, you don't need to alter your home, there are social activities, etc. Your sibling will see just how much this care costs, and you can visit and enjoy the elder without feeling burned out and unappreciated while also having constant strangers coming in and out. You also don't risk an sibling wanting constant tallies of every hour and what you did and claiming you are charging too much. Much easier when you need to go out of town as well or just need a break.

The decline can be terrifying and traumatic and not something you want to be subjected to 24-7. Plus, they can pick up on emotions and become agitated. So your stress can make it worse. It's a lot easier to hold it together when you go visit and use all the techniques to keep things pleasant, then leave.[/quote]

This^^^. I personally do not understand wanting to keep someone who should be in "memory care" at home.  It's exhausting care, and can be dangerous if you don't have excellent 24/7 care (that doesn't cancel on you).  Also, it is helpful to be around others to prevent future memory decline.  Eating meals together, doing puzzles (yes often toddler puzzles), etc, but just the social aspect will help.  I'd do memory care in a good facility and pay for an aide for 5-8 hours a day, if you can/want.   But living in a house where you can wander outside and disappear, accidentally try to use the stove, etc. is dangerous to everyone
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