Reply to Want to separate but just can’t bare hurting my kid

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My partner (same sex couple) just just 100% over our marriage.  She’s grumpy and annoyed with me so much of time and I just keep lowering and lowering the bar of what I’ll accept.  We have a wonderful 8 year old who adores both of us.  I can’t imagine only seeing her 50% of the time and having her childhood defined by alternating houses. Ugh.  I wish there was a trap door to a different reality.  On the one hand, I keep thinking I can hang in for the sake of my kid….on the other, I keep hearing the divorcing earlier is better than later so if I can’t make it for 10-12 more years, should I just separate now?  There’s no abuse or cheating; but there’s also very little affection or support.  [/quote]

Hi OP I’m your wife. Here is why I’m so cranky. You are driving me INSANE with your stonewalling and refusing to listen to what I need from you to make life functional. You won’t go to couples counseling. We can’t have a conversation about money, childcare, or travel without you losing your effing mind. You’re used to me doing the majority of the housework and I just can’t do it anymore, I’m going to die of exhaustion. Also, brush your damn teeth and wear your CPAP. I love you but god almighty enough is enough.

In case you are not actually my wife, have you tried asking her, honestly? And listening and accepting her answer? She’s pissed for a reason and probably hasn’t been able to tell you. If you guys havent done couples counseling, it’s time. Check out the Gottman Method.[/quote]

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