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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am giving a lot of space to my kids in college and beyond because  DH and I have always been super involved, super protective, hyper-focussed, somewhat anxious hovering helicopter/snowplow parents.  We have invested a lot in our kids to make them successful.  And now that they are on a good path, we are making sure that we are removing the training wheels.

So, it may seem that we are distant but we have set them up for success and then given them space.  Of course we have expectations from them too regarding their physical, mental, emotional, social, professional, personal, spiritual, financial health that is unspoken but very much understood.

We are letting them do as much adulting as they want and need. [/quote]

WTF are your expectations?  You have spiritual expectations?

[/quote]

My expectations from my kids are that they will take care of their physical and mental health, they will  have a healthy routine at home to take care of their household, they will continue to learn domestic skills, they will keep in touch with family & friends, they will have hobbies and interests and keep expanding their friends circle, they will know how to be good hosts and reciprocate when others host them,  they will have financial sense to save and invest their money, they will keep getting new certifications and skills so that they are progressing in their career, they will be dating good people with similar background, they will be giving back to the world and meditate daily so that they can remove negativity from their lives.

We have given them the foundation to do all of this through their childhood and now that they are on their own hopefully they are able to see the benefit of their upbringing.  I don't want them to be depressed, sick, lonely, directionless, broke, estranged from family like many kids they encountered at college. It was an eye-opening  experience for them. [/quote]

I can see having hopes and goals for my kids but "expectations" seems like some kind of demand that they turn out to be the kids you think you raised.

Just curious what you plan to say or do to them when they fail one or more of your "expectations".[/quote]

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