Reply to Au Pair Parroting Racist/homophobic Comments

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We had a white Au pair from South Africa, who made some inappropriate racist comments. In my case, it helped me to remember that she was very young (19) with very little education (just high school) and VERY little life experience. So I started a dialog with her and tried to educate her - or at least give her understanding of race relations in the US.

I would take the same approach here. Imagine she’s your daughter, and instead of reprimanding her out the gate, consider whether she is just purely ignorant, and if you can help her learn and grow. Or at the very least, by calling her out, she’ll learn that those comments aren’t welcome in your home. [/quote]
OP here.  Thank you PP.  I'm concerned that even calling out these comments won't stop them.  (We can't police an au pair all the time.)  It's also not that easy to essentially kick someone out of your house.  Omg, am I fu***d.[/quote]

You? Please stop being so self-centered. SHE is the one in trouble, being brainwashed, and possibly used by this overbearing man. 
Your kids are not in trouble either. I grew up around a White Supremacist grandmother. My kids have heard a lot of crap from my side of the family. Neither my kids (now teens and young adults) nor I are right-wing, or harbor racist or homophobic views. People aren't so easy to manipulate when they're secure and have been exposed to a variety of populations and living situations. Your kids are secure, but your au pair is not. She's extremely vulnerable: maybe her family life hasn't been great, and right now she's in a strange country, living in a strange house, and has fallen for a man who whispers poison in her ear. Teen and young adult brains are not yet fully-developed and they are prone to extreme thinking.

Please have some compassion and try to educate her.

There isn’t such brain washed here, the AP has her autonomy and her beliefs are HERS not YOURS-get it straight, to each it’s own- y’all sounded so judgy! 
[/quote][/quote]

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