Reply to My mother's hoarding is going to break me

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[quote=Anonymous]I am a child of a hoarder (who has been hoarding my entire life, my mother did not only get started when she was older). Replied on here demonstrate how naive people are about hoarding and howl little information is out there to help. I wish I had better news.

OP, don’t let this break you but at the same time please try to accept that your mother most likely will not change. By all means, see if anti-anxiety or SSRI can help and I hope that it does. But it won’t be that simple.

My mother has chosen literal trash over me and my children. And she also hoards furniture and random estate sale crap. The smell is awful. The dust is awful. There are mice all over. The walls are stained everywhere from who knows what (as if she smoked). My children, who are teens, have never been inside. I was in there 3 years ago for about 5 min.

I would be straight up honest with her. Tell her exactly what you wrote here: it is breaking you, you don’t want to deal with this mess when she dies and maybe try if she loved you this would be such a great gift to let you clean it. But in all likelihood the illness rules and she says no. I’m sorry.

I also would not be staying in a hoarded house. Tell her no. She won’t like it, people who are used to getting their way don’t like when others hold boundaries. Do it. [/quote]

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