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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP again. Sorry, other realistic thing that I'm nervous about happening is my niece driving someplace while intoxicated or high. I have no evidence she's done this, but she's a kid who is pretty open about her use (which makes me think it's pretty frequent if I'm seeing this much evidence as just an aunt). My mom seems to think it's great that they can now drive to places (in theory hasn't happened) together on their own, and I have no doubts she'd sent them off to spend time together at a mall or give them a credit card to have lunch together if they were spending the day at her place, as she's talked about how wonderful it is that they could do things like that. [/quote]

Well there, I think you need to set a hard line that you're not comfortable with that and insist they at least take ubers if that happens. Mom's rule. It can be that you don't allow her to drive with any new drivers, if you do not want to mention her substance problem directly. DD needs to straight up say she's not allowed to get in the car with cousin, ever. Don't let her be put into a situation where she ever has to gauge whether she thinks cousin is drunk or not and figure out whether it's safe.

I actually would probably just mention the substances though. Since your niece apparently drinks openly it's no secret, so I would just say "sorry, we are not comfortable with DD being driven by cousin because cousin drinks alcohol regularly." [/quote]

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