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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’ve never been that close with someone for so many years and still felt that they or their lives are “perfect.”  That seems so weird to me.  When I am friends with someone usually some vulnerability develops and I lose that instinct to compare myself to them.

Are you just a very competitive person in general OP?  Do you maybe feel that you have one over on most people except for this lady?[/quote]

I had wondered whether the friend was more guarded, hence the lack of disclosure of deeper issues. Over 12 years it seems like something would have come up.

Maybe the friend is wearing a protective coating both in appearance and in how she discloses. Maybe in turn, OP doesn’t disclose her vulnerabilities either.  That would keep them on this more superficial plane for a long time. [/quote]

This is where I land too. The friend is not vulnerable on the same level as OP and that's what keeps her from being more real and thus intimidatingly perfect. [/quote]

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