Reply to staying very close friends with an ex

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don’t think it’s possible.  What happens when she gets a serious boyfriend or you get a serious girlfriend.  Someone somewhere isn’t going to be happy about your relationship with your ex.[/quote]

This is what happened to me- the new Gf didn’t like our friendship and he had to choose. I get it and stepped back and went no contact, but honestly it hurt more than any romantic breakup I have ever gone through[/quote]

Of course it did. Because either you weren’t over him or you both weren’t over each other. The new girlfriend wasn’t an idiot and figured this out. Good for her for holding a boundary on the issue. Your ex wasn’t choosing between a “friendship” with you and a relationship with her. He was choosing a relationship with one of you. Whether it was going to be you or her, there wasn’t room for both.

FYI I had a guy derail my life for a number of years because he pulled some nonsense like this. I consider both he and his ex to be really pathological because they both knew what they were doing and never should have pulled me into their unresolved issues. I’m older and wiser now. But they did some real damage to me.

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