Reply to How to support teen who's always the initiator?

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[quote=Anonymous]There are two scenarios possible here:

1 - and I think this is more likely - is that if your kid didn’t plan the meetups/initiate, that no one would be doing anything. Like a PP said, they’d be sitting at home on their phones. There’s a lot of anxiety with the teen generation and a lot of them fear reaching out because of fear of rejection. In this case, it’s a great thing if your DD is the planner. Especially if the other kids are accepting her reaching out!

2 - maybe there is a fear on your DD’s part that “everyone is hanging out without her.” But is that really happening? Also, keep in mind, even in the teen years, the parents still control a lot. Not letting kids come over because of this or that reason, or the kid can’t get a ride if they aren’t driving yet, or parents say only one kid can come over at a time (that one was my parents in particular because they are weird, probably undiagnosed ASD, and hate loud environments and too many people around).

I do think this will get better in college, maybe even later in HS if more kids start driving. Does your DD have a wide circle of friends/acquaintances, not just from school but also from outside of school activities, a job, even at school does she know kids from different activities and at different grade levels etc.? It could also be that she’s more outgoing but the friend group is more low energy introverts. [/quote]

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