Reply to Lonely in middle age but finding that I don't like many people

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Lonely in middle age but finding that I don't like many people"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You ought to work on preventing these depressing behaviors from ruling your life. It is easier said than done, but you should still try to work on it.
I am 53, and DH is a bit older. I have noticed more rigid behaviors from DH, and both of us get annoyed with things we used to shrug off.
I am always trying to read, achieve more at work, and prevent myself from becoming that negative old woman who hates everything and everyone.[/quote]

When people don’t reciprocate it’s easy to become dejected. Based on what I saw as a kid 40 years ago, my grandparents had it easier. They were really tied to their community and had life long friends.[/quote]
That is true, for sure. We are more lonely today than our grandparents were. However, I notice that this might be due to our choices as we age. My FIL turned down every offer of BBQ and every event from friends when he became a widower. He started hating people and was even diagnosed with depression. He told his doctor that he didn't care, but it was his turn to make people miserable. And he sure does make the best effort at this! My mom said she has nothing to be happy about in her life! She is with her youngest grandchild, late, to be sure, and I can tell you she loves every minute of it but still acts like she has nothing to be happy about in her life. Mom owns a huge house, has a very good retirement income, and lives with my sister, who takes care of the yard and the bills and takes her on vacations every few months!

Dh and I have these two examples pushing us to improve and do more things together and try not to turn into FIL and mom. Recently retired friends play badminton, go to the river every evening (they live in Canada on the river close to the U.S.), watch boats, and are trying to build a new community in a smaller town where they retired. 
I am writing all this to say it has to do with choices. I find myself getting irritated with people all the time, too. I am no exception, and I am facing the same as you are. On top of that, I am an immigrant here, so most of my family is in Europe. Maybe someone else has some suggestions for both of us as to how to find walking groups and breakfast groups and make new friends.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics