Reply to Wife hates DC, but my job and friends are here

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I would consider whether something else is really at the bottom of this issue, like your wife feels generally unheard/unappreciated, and is focusing on this issue. Are there other resentments that she's not voicing, but are piling on here? Is it like a midlife crisis? I'd try to figure out what's really driving the emotions here, before proceeding accordingly. [/quote]

Oh give me a break. Dc is a nightmare. Everything is way more difficult than it needs to be. It’s perfectly reasonable to hate dc without it being a sign of some hidden issue with the relationship.[/quote]

This. I don't know a single person who "likes" DC. I know many people who like their professional opportunities in DC.  But everyone I know in DC is at best tolerating DC as a place they will live "until they can go somewhere else" when they retire or their kids get older.

I understand there are -some- people out there who love DC. I've heard of them. In the 15 years I spent there, I was never friends with any of them. In fact, 25 years later, I don't have many friends left in DC. Probably just a handful, plus old work colleagues.

In light of that, I don't think that just because you live in DC now, that means forever and ever, your family has to stay in DC or its crappy rural suburbs.  I don't think the compromise is a house in the burbs.  A compromise is like "we've been in DC for ages 25-45 because that's where we met in grad school so it made sense to stay, but let's go somewhere else for ages 45-64".

But like another poster said, all of this depends on many additional facts, like how you ended up in dc, what your original ties are, what you both do, has your wife always expressed this, was there a plan to stay in DC, what do you do, what does she do, etc etc.  [/quote]

+1[/quote]

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