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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I actually did this, but reverse. I was the nanny in the situation and my NF had a 2yo when MB and I got pregnant around the same time, but her with twins and me with a singleton. I took 6 weeks unpaid (I did not have STD) and when I returned their oldest was almost 3 so she started a Montessori program from 9-3 everyday which left me with the 3 babies a majority of the time. This is the agreement that we came to and were all happy with.

-I wouldn't get a raise for at least 2 years
-If my baby was sick, I would find alternate care and still come to work
-I had to provide more flexibility with schedule
-We agreed that I would use their same dentist and ped so I could make all the kids' check ups and cleanings together (this worked beautifully)

This was their mindset:
-My baby would get less sick at their house than at childcare which should lessen my days off
-I could be more flexible because I didn't have to rush out for daycare pick up

It was honestly a beautiful relationship that last 2.5 more years until I got pregnant with my second. I stayed through the babies getting to preschool. The kids are all still close. We have monthly family dinners. I've begun a second career that MB supported me with her business knowledge. They still call me for parenting advice. It was a major net positive for all of us.[/quote]

OP here. Thanks for sharing your experience, this was an interesting insight.

When she first broke the news, she asked whether I would consider letting her bring her children to work with her. I told her I'd think about it, but privately thought that was an insane thing to ask. Then I did some research online and found that it's actually a (very?) common situation, and that really surprised me. I panicked a little and came here with my initial post. I didn't want to be unfair to her, but even if she was only having one child, I don't think I could get comfortable with her bringing her baby to work. I really am not looking for a glorified babysitter, I want someone who is focused on my child's development and milestones and I thought it would be difficult to pay that level of attention to a child when you are also looking after two or three other children, especially infants! I had a difficult enough time managing to get everything done when I had one infant. If you don't mind me asking, do you have any tricks or tips for how you managed it? We're now considering having me become a stay at home mom once the baby comes. Our son will be in preschool, so there will be less for me to manage, and we can get part-time help to assist for the two hours between the end of his day at preschool and the time that my husband gets home. [/quote]

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