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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So my dad died after a long illness. He was a very good Dad and I had a good relationship with him. No regrets, no guilt. I miss him.

However, I find myself feeling so lethargic now - I don't want to do anything. I have a job and married with 2 kids (tweens) and I can barely elicit the energy to do the minimum. It's a struggle to keep any momentum at work, and it's hard for me to be engaged in stuff related to the kids (their ECs, their camps, keeping up with their studying). Through the long illness, I tried to encourage my own immediate family to go about their business as best they could - they didn't have to miss or skip anything, except one day of school/work for the funeral. Now my husband keeps suggesting things to do - shows, museums, parties, movies. I am an introvert at baseline but usually game for all of that. At present, I don't want to do anything. All i want to do is read, walk/run, take long showers, eat pasta, and watch crap TV in bed.  He has invited people over twice in the last month (once a family just for dinner, and now cousins for a long weekend). My kids (also social like their Dad) keep hosting playdates. It feels like having my teeth pulled. I don't dislike these people - I just don't want to see anyone. I find it exhausting to be positive and exhausting to even have a conversation.

Do you think this is when people get on meds? It's been about a month. To me, it feels like wanting mental space is a normal part of grieving but it seems like others think that the way I am not just "moving on" is grounds for getting on an antidepressant. [/quote]

It's totally normal for you to be in deep grief after only a month.  Let your husband and children know that having people over to the house isn't going to be possible for at least another month.  They can go out if they need to socialize.

In the meantime, you need to do what you need to do.

I started talk therapy after my father died and I'm really glad I did.  You might consider it, even if only for a while.[/quote]

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