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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My mother suffered a fall and broke her ankle in 2018. She refused surgery and I did not want to poke the bear, so I left it at that - no physical therapy, just left the leg to heal. Years later, her leg is over-pronated, she has suffered about 4 falls, she finds it difficult to walk.
she also just got diagnosed with vestibular schwannoma which is messing up her balance. I am doing as much research as I can to help her make the best decision.

I am consumed with regret daily for not caring about her choices with her leg and at least convincing her to do something about it. I don't think she would have as much balance issues as she is having now if she treated the broken ankle.

[/quote]

But she had refused; it was her choice to make. I’m certain her physicians at the time informed her of the consequences of doing nothing, and even if they hadn’t, she opted to put her head in the sand. What makes you think you could’ve had an impact on her decision-making at the time?The extremity of her behavior reflects that your two cents would have been ineffective at best. You had a reason not to “poke the bear” at the time and I highly doubt it was as simple as “not caring about her choices about her leg.”

Regardless - we change the past - it does not benefit you or your mother to live in regret. She alone made the choice not to treat her original injury. And there was a chance it would’ve worked out; none of us have a crystal ball.

Let it go, or get some CBT to help do so.[/quote]

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