Reply to Rant: “you look amazing”

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I hear you OP.

The only way my daughter slept in the first three months was if I walked her. So I walked her. For miles every day. And when I wasn’t walking I was nursing. And then my OB said what a “great job” I had done being under my pre-pregnancy weight at six weeks (I was a normal pre-pregnancy weight  I had no need to be lower…) and then scolded me when she measured my blood pressure (dangerously low). Pick one lady. Society’s obsessive and reflexive notion that slim=perfect is dangerous to women.[/quote]

Very similar experience. I dropped weight very quickly after giving birth because of nursing and a lot of pressure from family to be very active (tons of pressure to entertain and visit people so they could meet the baby, and my husband was very antsy on parental leave and would get annoyed if we were just hanging out around the house so kept pushing me to go out and do things). My weight loss was seen as impressive and positive by everyone around me, like "oh good for you, you must be so thrilled."

But really I was struggling with my mood and also obviously having a hard time asserting my own needs (which actually were to be more sedentary at home with the baby, who did not actually need all this activity). Everyone saw my weight loss as a sign of good health but it was actually a sign of other issues, and no one cared about those issues.

It's this distorted thinking that ignores other signs of health (or illness) in favor of fixation on weight, especially in women and especially after childbirth. I would actually have been much healthier if I'd retained more of the baby weight but taken better care of my mental health and had more support from family and friends to do what felt right to me, instead of pressure to do what other people wanted. [/quote]

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