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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Both my kids have very different friend groups than they had in 6th grade [/quote]

This is true but it happens slowly and not all at once. My younger DD is in 7th now and still struggling to find her people. Her ES friends decided they were too cool for her in MS. It’s been really hard.[b] I’m sure their parents don’t care as long as their kid is popular. [/b][/quote]

What do you really want the parents to do? They can encourage kindness, but it’s hard to force a child to hang out with someone they don’t like anymore. (And my kid was excluded by his old friends , so I am not just one of popular kids’ parents).[/quote]

Parents care way too much if their kids is a cool or popular. I've seen it to many times on here with threads. "Is my kid too old for.." or "my tween, young teen is still acting like a kid." As for this thread, contrary to what ppl believe friends don't usually ditch friends for just differing interests or activities. It is usually for a bigger reasond and what kids believe is a good reason.[/quote]

Oh those posts bug me too. People who are making parenting decisions based on how their kid's friends will perceive their child as a result, and not based on what their kid is actually ready for. It's gross.

I also know parents who encourage their kids who have eclectic tastes in clothes or media to have more mainstream, popular choices, and I think that's sad. It's okay if your kid isn't into the same music that 90% of tweens like. Or isn't sporty or whatever. Let them like what they actually like and they WILL find friends who share their interests. And then they'll get to feel liked for who they actually are, and not because they have the "right" clothes and the "right" interests and know the "right" shows and songs and games. You might produce a popular kid by micromanaging their interests, but you will also produce a deeply insecure kid who worries that if they make a mistake, they'll lose all their friends (which they might, if they are in a crowd who bases friendship on whether you have the correct shoes or musical taste). You are actually handicapping your kid for life with this.[/quote]

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