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[quote=Anonymous]Here's one conclusion I've reached after a lot of thought.  If you are very perfectionistic and conforming about yourself, your family, your home, and your lifestyle, I think it will take more time.  The moms I know who tend to think of themselves this way seem to be dealt a kind of double blow.  I know that I always thought of myself as kind of kooky, kind of an outsider if you will, a free spirit.  I'm not saying that having a special needs child was something that made me go "Oh, Perfect!" but I think that I never cared as much as many other women what strangers thought of me and about being part of the group, etc.  Feelings of loss about fitting in occur to me on behalf of my child when my child is not included, but not so much about my life because I've always felt like kind of an oddball.

So I'll just put that out there.  I think the more perfectionistic you are and the higher need you have to be perceived as just one of the neighborhood moms, the harder it may be.  And I'm not saying there's anything wrong with fitting in -- it's just that we all have different needs and personalities we are starting out with.[/quote]

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