Reply to Having a baby to cement marriage

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP again. I’d also like to say our relationship is amazing. I don’t want a baby because it’s rocky. I’m considering it because we have the same values and I really admire him as a father. I didn’t have that with my first marriage. I think I would enjoy raising a child with him.[/quote]

[b]You are raising a child with him--your daughter.[/b] Don't take away his free time because you are insecure. [/quote]

DP. To the OP, even if you are not insecure -- please heed the bold, above. You are already "raising a child with him." If you are deeply invested in some idea that you need to have his biological child to feel that you are "raising a child together," [i]you need to think very seriously about why you're putting so much emphasis on having to have a child he fathered be your child as a couple[/i]. You...don't. Even if your child's dad is in the picture, your new husband has a crucial role to play with the child you ALREADY have.

He fathered three kids, using the values you admire--hooray, those values are being passed along. He will parent your current child with those same values. Why must you have a new baby so you get to witness him being an admirable dad? [/quote]

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