Reply to miss being ‘fat and happy’

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It will wane with time. 1 year? 2 years? My analog is smoking cigarettes. It’s gross! It smells horrible! How could anyone enjoy smoking or being fat?

Except when you quit smoking, it’s like a romantic breakup. Suddenly you see happy smokers / happy couples everywhere seemingly flaunting their happiness at you. There are wistful thoughts about “the good times” and physical habits to break like texting him or the extra walk around the block before you come back from lunch. Even when the most visceral cravings are gone, the memory of it pops in your mind at the oddest times. I thought I’d never stop thinking about smoking - but eventually I did. By 1 year, I’d have a fleeting thought once a week? Every few weeks? By 2 years, it was every few months. 12 years now and I don’t think about cigarettes unless I catch a whiff of smoke and even then it’s like glancing at a photo of an ex boyfriend and feeling nothing - like “oh hey, remember that!” and moving on.

I went on a strict diet years ago and I remember missing eating a really big meal once in a while - not the feeling of being stuffed. More the feeling of not counting or weighing anything and just being in the moment and eating what I wanted. It was similar to that wistful feeling when I had quit smoking and was over the initial jitters, but it was still fresh in my memory. [/quote]

Before the scolds come at me, I want to add that I get what you are saying OP. Besides my experiences dieting and quitting smoking, I’ve also taken several different ADHD meds, been pumped full of hormones for fertility treatments, and been pregnant and nursed twice. All of those things mess with your head and your appetite in weird unconscious ways.  It wasn’t until I quit smoking and it was so pronounced that I understood and then I noticed it all the time. Even when you are on guard for cravings that are not actual hunger, or you know your mind will play tricks on you to get the addictive substance - it is hard to notice it and control it in the moment. 
It’s the same way insects can get brain controlling viruses or that one disease makes mice unafraid of cats. The meds you are on mess with your head. Having a history of an eating disorder messes with your head. What you are feeling can be both incorrect / not logical and also very, very real to you. With patience you should adjust and settle into your new normal. [/quote]

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