Reply to Questions for People in Their 50s With Career Success and Family "Success" (success defined as deep satisfaction)

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[quote=Anonymous]Mid 50s here and very satisfied with how things have turned out both with family/kids and job.

About 15 years ago I chose to dial back a pretty successful career track to allow more time for family & kids; still working, but with slower to little career growth than if I'd been solely career focused.  It was a decision I was 100% behind but I recognize others might not choose. That said, I know very few people who have fully optimized BOTH career and family; typically there are trade-offs to be made, and only you can determine what side of the scale feels right to focus your efforts more heavily on right now.

The one thing you didn't ask about is spouses/partner's career.  IMO that is an essential factor in the decision you're facing. Unfortunately several of the families I've known with two parents pursuing super-demanding careers while raising multiple kids have faced some collateral problems that I wished to avoid (not to suggest those problems couldn't have happened without such career demands, but there's no doubt it contributed to stress and fallout.)  In our situation, my spouse was running a fast-growing startup with a lot of demands on his time.  Fortunately he's also a very involved parent, but I understood that one of us needed more flexibility in our schedules to be able to fully support our kids; I was more than happy to be that person.  I wanted to invest more time being present as a parent, knowing how fleeting the child-raising years are.  Sure enough, the years flew by and now I'm SO grateful I made the pivot I did.  I honestly could not have invested the time I did into our children's well being and development had I continued on the career path I'd previously been on. No regrets.

And now I'm on chapter two (very different) of my career and enjoying where that is heading. I'm not making headlines but I'm content.

3. What "mattered" to you at the end of the day, now in your mid 50s? 
Looking back, raising grounded, kind and responsible young adults that we truly enjoy being around seems like the most important "job" we've invested in. Of course, it's certainly possible to have both a successful career and "successful" kids (however you define each of those), but I personally couldn't see a healthy outcome had I continued my career with the intensity I'd had earlier.

Life is good.  And we've absolutely had a large dose of luck and good fortune along the way, too.

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