Reply to Staying home for the first 3-4 years

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If you don’t mind advice from an older mom (oldest in college and youngest in HS)

I loved being a SAHM even though money was tight and we had to sacrifice in some areas. My plan was to stay home until K but I had 3 kids which ended up meaning staying at home for 11 years instead of 5. Then by the time the youngest was in K, we had identified that 2 had disabilities that required therapies. It just seemed easier to continue to stay home. I liked that it provided lots of opportunities to volunteer. I really enjoyed it and will never regret the time.  But it came at a cost because I was out too long. I have been unsuccessful reentering the workforce and now my marriage is on shaky ground which is causing me tremendous anxiety. So my advice is go for it but have a firm deadline for return to work. [/quote]

I totally agree with having a deadline or plan in place. I stayed home with my kids and found it very difficult. It also overlapped with peak COVID so things are different now.

Find a community to engage with. In this area not many mothers stay home (in my experience) and it can be very lonely. It’s hard to know what you’re signing up for and could be easy to have some resentments with your partner if it’s not exactly what you expected.

Also, the longer you are out of the workforce the harder it can be to re join. I know that’s not true for every field but something to keep in mind. At the end of the day I think you’ll be hard pressed to find someone who outright regrets having more time with their children, but there are real consequences both good and bad that last. [/quote]

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