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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]DD will do "two and two"--two years at a local community college and then transfer to a four-year university. 
She's in therapy. She has her issues, too. He was good for her in some ways--he's a more serious student than she was-- and at the end of high school, it will be time to say "thank you, next." Just want to make sure she has the confidence to say that (the lyrics of an Ariana Grande song, I think). [/quote]

New poster here.  With a son and a brother with anxiety.  My brother is VERY controlling and has had some bad relationships.  I'm trying hard not to let that happen with my son and any girlfriends. I talk to him often about respecting a girl's boundaries, and have suggested that one weekend night be for his girlfriend and one weekend night be for hanging out with his friends. Because no friend group likes it when they suddenly get ditched for a new girlfriend/boyfriend. (this might be something to mention to your daughter, about a healthy division of time among all her friend groups/boyfriend).

In your shoes, I think I'd focus on helping your daughter stand up for what she wants. If she told you about these types of comments, they are bothering her.  If she wants to go out with her friends and he protests, she can try saying, "It's important to me to spend time with friends. You and I can meet up tomorrow at 2. I know you are disappointed, but making comments about finding a new girlfriend isn't healthy or loving.  I'm sure we can work something out to meet both our needs.  That's what loving couples do."

1) both of them are young and learning how to have relationships.  
2) if she frames the situation as something that's important to her, she will begin to recognize her needs matter too.  
3) the language helps the boy see she cares about him and wants to work together as a team, but also that she has boundaries.

This relationship will probably end. But helping her navigate it to prioritize herself during the process, rather than trying to expedite the breakup (not saying you are), tends to be more productive and gives her the skills to address her next relationship. [/quote]

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