Reply to Give me ALL the talking points for talking to parents about downsizing and/or moving

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[quote=Anonymous]I started by talking about choice. Anytime their friend or something came up via news, I’d “think out loud” about how difficult it must of been for (friend) to have no choice in where they moved to, what to keep or give away. The idea being “move now while healthy and have choices or you may have to move suddenly with no choices”.

I’d also mention, that it’s better to move when they are healthy and can still make friends. Nothing worse than being too old and ill to make new friends.

Then I’d talk about Swedish Death Cleaning (although I wouldn’t call it that). My parents never wanted to be a burden. So I’d bring up X friend who had the burden of cleaning out their parent’s house while grieving. Then move into, let’s get rid of the easy stuff —broken things and old papers.

Use an organization that is a certified Senior Move Manager to help with downsizing. They were good about helping my Dad let go of stuff. And convincing him that it would be “donated”. I’m sure most of it was thrown away because it was junk.

Also, start taking stuff “home” with you. Parents want to give us stuff. Just take it. Rent a truck put as much stuff as you can in the truck, then donate or trash most of it on the way out of town. If they ask, tell them a friend’s kid needed it to set up an apartment at college or new town. They just want to know it went to a good home.

We also put stuff in storage. They never looked at it again, but knowing it was there made them happy.

https://www.nasmm.org/

Fortunately, it got my parents to get on a waitlist for a CCRC near me. Unfortunately, my Dad loved the house (pride-look at what I’ve been able to build up and own!). And my Mom had the beginnings of dementia that we didn’t recognize, so she really dug in. 
So when a health crises hit, I had to move them. And they lost all choice.

My Dad acknowledged he should have moved by the time he was 75. 
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