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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have a 6th grade boy who is fairly athletic and he's not a fan of the sports bros either. He gravitates to the quieter kids who excel academically.

He'll find his people. You need to have confidence in him and he needs to have confidence in himself. Boys trash talk sports in MS. It happens. He has to figure out how to weather the storm and identify people who are healthier for him. It's part of the maturing process.[/quote]

+1. I don't have a middle schooler but have worked with them extensively in after-school/mentoring programs and you can't waive away or diminish the overwhelming-ness of peer pressure at that age. I read something recently about the biggest risk factor for kids' mental health being a lack of feeling like a contributor (whether that's to a sport, a club, the family unit). Are there STEM clubs your son could join, apart from school, where he'd find that chance to contribute to a group? Alternately, are there chores or odd jobs he could do locally? A way to apply his STEM skills (say, freelance computer repair, or tutoring for younger kids)?

Somewhat related anecdote: I was grocery shopping with my toddler a few weeks ago and a loud gaggle of middle school boys passed us in an aisle chomping on donuts in a big box from the Dunkin' next door. Snack-obsessed toddler stared at them intensely as they walked by and I laughed, "she's jealous!". The boys sort of chuckled as they turned down the next aisle - then a minute later, they came back and asked me if toddler would like one of their donuts. It was such a sweet glimpse of the good hearts that lurk behind snarky teen exteriors. Give the kids opportunities to rise to the occasion, and most of them will.[/quote]

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