Reply to Maternity leave with a premie (34 weeker)

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[quote=Anonymous]I had a 34-weeker. She was in the NICU 11 days. A good friend had a 34-weeker who was in the NICU for almost 30 days (the baby had trouble learning how to suckle).  Every baby and situation is different.

Is this your first baby? I already had a child and had to split my mind and heart into two and be OK with always leaving one behind to give my full focus to the one I was with. I couldn't spend all my time at the NICU and trusted the nurses to look after my baby. (I trusted the doctors too but really, it's the nurses who run the NICU.)

A job is different to an existing child, but it could work the same.  If you can, I would suggest trying to work and save the bulk of your leave for when the baby comes homes. In my experience, life gets so much more challenging once the premie comes home. Their schedule is more demanding than a full-term baby and they don't follow the same milestones. There were so many doctor appointments (regular pediatrician, developmental pediatrician, PT, OT, early intervention).  I was already at home with our other child, but those first months were still overwhelming. At one point, my husband was so exhausted he thought he was having a stroke.  I don't type this to scare you - those early weeks were wonderful and sweet and watching my premie grow and change was awesome.  But you asked for opinions and that's mine.  [/quote]

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