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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
Why so much drama, OP?

Your story can be reduced to:

Elderly folks decide to spend all their money on themselves, perhaps too hastily given possible future eldercare costs, or not, because no one can predict the future.
[b]
Adult children decide to limit future expenditure on eldercare, given their parents' decision.[/b]

The end.

All this is normal, understandable and not shocking. There is no need to create a thread on this.

[/quote]

Clearly you are not good at avoiding what you see as drama as you decided to comment.

Regarding the bolded, so many folks post here and on the FB Sandwich Generation page on what to do when parents need support, especially if they may not have been conservative with their money. It's a fairly common theme.

Then there are two siblings involved with fairly different HHI. There are many posts here and on that FB page about how to navigate when siblings have different POVs, bank accounts, etc in these circumstances.

Then there are, in some instances, spouses/partners of these siblings who may have their own set of circumstances they are navigating with their own relations.

I am not sure it is so cut and dry to "limit future expenditure on eldercare, given their parents' decision." I can see DH struggling with wanting to support his parents, but not necessarily in the style in which his mom may want to be. Can also see him struggling if he does support yet there are some remaining parental funds - should those remainders then be split evenly with his sibling or should the funds reimburse him for the expenditures.

I thought the article was interesting as it confirmed something I had been observing for awhile in my extended family and with my friends and their families. Was also piqued by it as I see a chasm between a generation of folks where some were able to live well due to low housing costs/good school districts and the following ones where it takes a lot more dollars to live in a comparable school district, pay for healthcare, etc. That former generation can often think that the problem is a Starbuck's latte.

The intergenerational transfer of assets has played a fairly significant role in our economy. The cessation of that, or at least to a large extent, will also have ripple effects.

[/quote]

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