Reply to Move Parents to Local Nursing Home or Far Away with Me?

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[quote=Anonymous]OP here.  Thank you all for your replies.  I cannot reply to each one individually.
  
Where we are today:  I talked to my parents and they "will think about" moving to the nursing home.  They know its reputation and are willing to consider it.  They said they do not want 24/7 caregivers in their home.  That's a moot point anyway because 24/7 caregivers cost over $20K/month and they can't afford that.  It costs half that to go to nursing home.  So home healthcare is off the table.

About my mom living with dad in a memory care unit.  We are not sure if she has dementia or not.  No formal diagnosis. 
It's possible but it's hard to tell because of her speech issues post-stroke.  Dad has diagnosed early stage dementia.  The facility we are considering has only 2 options- assisted living or memory care.  No regular nursing home unit.  Assisted living would not be enough help for them.  This place would allow them to be together in one room in memory care.  Also, brother 2 works across the street so he could pop in more frequently than at another place.

There is one other good nursing home in the county that has a regular nursing home unit plus a memory care unit but they would have separate rooms and be 30 miles from family.  There is no way mom and dad would do separate rooms.  They would be constantly worried about the other one if they were separated.  The first facility is smaller and less residents.  2nd facility part of a large chain. Way bigger.

They each need a doc appt for a physical pre-nursing home admission so we are doing those this week & next in order to check that box.  I also am getting the ball rolling on the POAs.         [/quote]

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