Reply to Venting about DH who says consequences are upsetting teen son

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[quote=Anonymous]A few thoughts. A 13 year old and 17 year old should not expect to be treated the same and I would assume this ha been made clear to them a million times over the years. So far the 17 year old has probably mostly benefitted from this -- later bedtime when they were younger, first to get a phone, first to sit in the front seat, etc.

Personally, I decided middle school was the time to stop packing lunch. I have a middle schooler and one in her last year of ES. The older one packs his lunch. I help him out when he has a lot of homework or a late sporting event, but he packs it for the most part. The younger one knows she will next year. I am not saying that is the right time for everyone, but I 100% think a 17 year old should be packing his own lunch.

I also think stopping packing as a consequence (versus time to start learning to take care of yourself) is perfectly appropriate in this situation. For me it would be more about making the lunch and then him going out. Not the fact that he doesn't remember to put it in the fridge because I would not reuse it anyway after 7 or 8 hours--though my kids don't like an ice pack in their lunch.  If your kids use one, maybe that would be okay.

Your husband sounds like a dick. I am not sure what else to say about that. Maybe counseling to get on the same page. [/quote]

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