Reply to Why people don't get along with their in-laws?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Despite their son and I having a lot in common, I have little to anything in common with any of them...... So I am nice and cordial. But I am not going to buy all of the gifts and send all of the cards and letters. And thank you notes. I do that for my family. No reason my husband cannot do it for his. [/quote]

This attitude is why lots don't get along with their in-laws. People treat their in-laws like in-laws instead of like their own family. Good luck to you "Despite their son and I having a lot in common..." [/quote]

DP here.  I kind of see PP's point though - after years of taking on the extra responsibilities, you would likely get sick and tired of it, because it either becomes expected, or unacknowledged.  I don't need a red carpet, but I feel like if I put the effort in, well, what's the use?

The clincher was when we would ask the siblings to go in on a big gift, and there would be radio silence. SIL would buy MIL what SIL wanted, which was fine, because MIL babysat weekly for SIL. But to feel like no one wants to participate, unless they wanted something (much bigger than a present, in this case) from you, it kind of sucked for DH. DH felt it much more than I did. When DH wanted to pull back, I fully supported him, but then they became angry. You can't win with some people, especially spoiled people. [/quote]

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