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[quote=Anonymous]^^ yep, me too, exact same thing. It has really impacted my ability to have relationships. I have searched for narcissistic personality disorder and other disorders to try and understand it. I don't know, its bizarre. I also have a successful outer life, but I've done some dark secret messed up stuff, and I have issues with responsibility/risk that all extend from a kind of lack of self preservation, if that makes sense, or a lack of self respect -- I think because I don't really feel engaged in well anything. This said, I make a relatively large salary, am a professional, have lots of friends, and good relationships with my family, but it is hard, because it all feels superficial/as only part of me is involved in any way. The only time I feel fully "present" is when I am getting to know a new person I am excited about (friend or love interest, in the past). Then I retreat to my head. Odd, I know.[/quote]
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