Reply to Studies show that after 45/50 is the height of happiness…. Tell me about it

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Subject line says it all… are you happier later in life than when you were when you were 35?[/quote]

I can only share my anecdotal experience.

I have struggled with refractory clinical depression since my teens and am early 50s now.

I would say that I spent most of my 20s and 30s really struggling with contentment because I was grappling with making meaning in my life and trying to sort family dynamics and relationships and building career etc. In this early adulthood I struggled a lot with the uncertainty of everything and the future, so much that I see looking back I allowed fear to be a self saboteur on many occasions. I recognize in retrospect this was really just very badly managed anxiety disorder.

I had a career peak and financial success in my early 40s and then fell into poor health which I’ve struggled with for several years now, with this last year being an upswing as I’m steadily recovering my health.

At present my life is fairly precarious - I’m working to build a new career for the next chapter and I’m working on my health. I have a quiet life and a much smaller social circle than most periods in the past, though I feel like I have a circle of old friends and family on Facebook who I touch base with nearly daily and that’s good.

I’m probably more content than I’ve ever been and that’s because I’m expecting nothing more than to hopefully have a good day today, and maybe also tomorrow.

I have a sweet and fairly young dog that I would like to care for the duration of her hopefully long life, but I bear in mind all the friends, colleagues, acquaintances, family members and cultural icons I’ve seen die in midlife - I know at this point it’s truly all borrowed time so I’ve got my affairs in order just in case including instructions for the care and feeding of the dog.

The most important thing I’ve achieved in my life to bring me to this level of peace of mind is just growing compassion and forgiveness for myself, for my many shortcomings and missteps in life - and also for everyone who has ever hurt me, because no doubt they were on their own journey of brokenness.

Compassion and forgiveness is the key to an elder experience that is relatively positive. There are still plenty of unhappy older people and it is usually the anger and regret they can’t let go of that keeps them unhappy all their whole lives. [/quote]

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