Reply to How can we avoid getting 'left behind' as the surviving spouse if dementia sets in?

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[quote=Anonymous]
Yes, OP, I understand exactly how you feel. Some posters on here are little too cavalier about the realities of old age.

You can make (younger!) friends who might help you with little things, and befriend your neighbors so they call a county social worker if they see you in difficulty, but the reality is that very few loved ones can take in an elderly person, especially one with aggressive dementia.

There are services accessible to those who can't pay for private nursing homes. Medicare homes. Some are fine, some are bad. But you'll need someone to help navigate the system for you. If you are alone in the world, then the state will make decisions for you, but it will take longer, the care won't be as good, and that's not the best option. However, it's the only option for many, many, people.

Perhaps moving in with your husband into a continuing care community with give you those first contacts who will keep an eye on your decline and guide your next steps.

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