Reply to Parent's money, spouse's lack of ambition.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My best friend suggested that my DH is underperforming in his career track because he knows I'll inherit some money in the future. I think that's bull. For one, my parents could live another 20 years and run through all of their money! I've always assumed they'll live long, and that I can't count on their money. And I've never told my DH how much money they have. But is it possible that he's taking it easy because he is expecting a windfall when they pass away? [/quote]

This is a lot to unpack.  First, rethink what you are telling your best friend. How do they know if your husband is or is not underperforming at his job? Is this something you have vented?  How do they know you are expecting a large inheritance?  Why would they put that out there to you connecting those two things and what is their motive in telling you?  It would never occur to me to say that to my friends because from a purely practical standpoint if the spouse underperforming at work IS an issue of marital discord then I assume if any inheritance comes down the line they would have either already divorced or they decided to stay together for all the years despite it and there are other things that balance it.  In addition the inheritance is to the individual not the couple so if my friend didn’t do-mingle, it’s really their money and the spouse only gets the benefit as long as they are married.

I would say with best friend and spouse if there is any talk of inheritance from your parents your go to line needs to be that it’s your their money and you assume they will spend it and you hope they enjoy spending it.  Neither your friend or spouse can be counting your parents money if you are making it clear that you aren’t counting on your parent’s money and your preference is for them to spend and enjoy it.[/quote]

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