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[quote=Anonymous]Our kids walk to school starting in middle school so we got them phones then. I considered the Gizmo but my oldest looked so crestfallen when I suggested it, and I'm glad I went with a regular phone. She is very responsible and doesn't abuse her privileges.

Re settings . . . The 11 year old cannot download any apps without permission (iPhone - parental controls). The 14 year old doesn't have Snapchat or Tiktok and can only use her private Instagram for an hour per day (she can send us a request for more time). Both of their phones go into "downtime" at a certain time of night, as does mine. They have to charge them outside of their rooms at night and we have access to look at them whenever we want.

Still, ya know, nothing is perfect, and kids are kids. You just have to trust that you were similarly able to access questionable things as a kid and you turned out OK. Have a close-knit relationship with your kid and check in a lot. I read a lot about screen addiction and talk about it with my kids; these apps are designed to suck as much time out of our lives as possible, and we have to be pro-active about prioritizing what's important to us (i.e. lash ourselves to the mast). We have books of sudoku and crossword puzzles and talk about how it's better for your brain to play games that way, etc.

I'm sure there are bumpy times ahead but so far my kids have been generally responsible. My oldest even told me when a friend of my youngest tried to use her to get Snapchat secretly (she had to send the code to someone older than 13). My guile-less kid told, "Larla's parents couldn't figure out how to approve Snapchat so I'm helping her," and I was like, oh sweetheart, and immediately texted Larla's mom, lol. NO, Larla's mom did not know about any of it.[/quote]

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