Reply to What are the cons to not finding out the gender?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think most people (of course not YOU, but lesser, dumber women) have a secret gender preference. Or a "sense" that they know and have already connected with the baby based on said gender. They would never admit this, but I think it's true. I've seen enough crestfallen moms on gender reveal memes to confirm.

The con is that your first moments together with your baby are ones tinged with disappointment  [/quote]

The thing about gender reveals - especially those recorded for social media - is that only people who [i]really[/i] care about gender are doing them.  So the dads that storm off and punch something when it's a girl or the moms that start crying when it's a boy have already self-selected for unhinged-ness.

But for slight preference, or sense of knowing - I think that's most parents.  I had a slight preference in one direction and a "knowing" in the other direction when I was pregnant, and when I got my baby all I had was joy even though it should seem like I would be disappointed by one or the other being dashed.  DH said he hoped it was a boy for the first trimester, and then over the course of having almost all the other guys in our circle say "you must really want a boy, though" when they found out we didn't know, he started to really push back against that point of view.  He was envisioning having a son and a daughter through the whole pregnancy (just like I was), and he started to feel offended on his hypothetical potential daughter's behalf, if that makes sense.  It was interesting to watch, because they weren't saying anything he didn't say when we first got the positive pregnancy test.  It might be a strange, isolated reaction, but I felt better about him as a dad to a boy or a girl because he stopped being so "Team Boy" about the pregnancy during the time we didn't know.

And I felt like it made the name picking easier, because we each had a strong preference for the first name for one gender but not the other.  It didn't feel like "my name" vs. "his name" winning out, it felt like it would be fate to see which kid we had.  (It helped that we each liked the other's choice as a name even if it wasn't our idea.)[/quote]

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