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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous] I don't think you can ban the other parent from taking the child to religious things on their parenting time OP.

[b]I'm very happy that we included Right of First Refusal. Ours starts at 4 hours-basically if the parent who has parenting time cannot care for the child for 4 hours or more, they must first offer parenting time to the other parent before getting other care (in school time is not included in this).[/b] Also our order specifies that parenting time is between the biological parents.

Really spelling things out like holidays, vacations, out of state notifications, future cell phone plans, orthodontics (mine says split cost whether needed or cosmetic, although our dc's is needed), passports, schooling, child contact with parents,  all the things, has been useful for us.

I suggest googling the Florida parenting plan. It's very thorough and will give you ideas of what to put in yours.[/quote]

NP here
Does it cover parties/time with friends?  If your kid's friend has a sleep over party from 6 pm-9 am and you are fine with your kid attending (and obviously you would not be there) can your ex contest this?[/quote]

PP here. We have not had this issue raised, but based on my reading of our plan-Yes, I believe the other parent could. Ours specifies that parenting time applies only to the biological parents. On one hand, it may let ex prevent dc from a sleepover that I approve of. On the other hand, I could prevent dc from a sleepover that I do not approve of. [/quote]

If its his time you should not be approving a sleep over.[/quote]

If it's in the agreement that parenting time is for biological parents, then yes you get offered parenting time first, before a child would spend extended time away from the biological parents.[/quote]

What happens when your child is 10 and really wants to go Lego day camp with his friends, or he’s 14 and he wants to go to a sleep-away lacrosse clinic with his team, and your ex decides he’s going to exercise his ROFR? Your provision is about you, not about what is best for your child.[/quote]

The ex would still have this imput if you were still married-if you were married one parent could still say no to that. And good luck to an ex who keeps a 14 yo instead of letting them go to the clinic-I'm sure child would be super pleasant and fun in that situation LOL.

If I go on a business trip on my parenting time, I offer ex the time first, before arranging care. Why shouldn't ex get parenting time with his own dc before a grandparent or friend? That is what rofr ensures.

It's in the child's best interest to be with one of their own parents. That's why that provision is there.

The clause also means that the other parent [/quote]

the point of divorcing is so that you minimize the amount of agreements and contact you have to make. ROFR means that you potentially have to negotiate with your ex every time you want to leave the kid for three hours. this may make sense for an infant but not an older child. and there can be unintended consequences like your ex flaking on an agreement to take the kids or blocking a sleepover with cousins.

barring some specific concerns (like not trusting a grandparent babysitting or thinking your ex will just pawn an infant off on a nanny) the best parenting agreement will be limited to the *actual* concerns you have, rather than being overly prescriptive. there are some theoretical issues you do want to cover because they are so important, like relocation. but you don’t want to try to dictate every tiny thing. [/quote]

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