Reply to Desperate plea for help with my 4 year old DD

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Reply to "Desperate plea for help with my 4 year old DD"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote]Around that time, my older DD took a left turn and became this miserable uncooperative being. I would stand in front of a moving train for this child, but I literally do not like being around her. She makes life completely miserable for her dad, her little sister and me. Her most common statements are "I don't want to!!" or "I hate that!" She never wants the baby in her room for even a second and will literally slam the door in her face. She doesn't want to share anything ever, in fact doesn't even want her sister to LOOK at her sometimes.
 
She is completely uncooperative with: getting dressed, going to the potty when it wasn't her idea (ie: if its bedtime or we're leaving the house), getting undressed, getting in carseat, getting on sunscreen, picking up toys, coming to the meal table.[/quote]

I think the suggestions already made about seeing a family therapist, parenting playgroups, etc. are good ones.  One other thing you may want to consider is seeing a therapist individually to help you deal with your feelings about the situation.  My 3 year old son can be very very difficult in similar ways and it was driving me crazy.  I went to see a therapist and he helped me work on being less emotionally invested in whether my child was doing what I asked.  I feel much less miserable now, and when I am able to give a more flat, unemotional response to my son's misbehavior, he's a bit more likely to do what I ask.  I wasn't yelling or screaming at him before, but I definitely did have an emotional investment in whether he put on his shoes etc. when I asked him, and he was feeding off of it.  [/quote]

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