Reply to How do courts rule when one parent is overly controlling (BPD/NPD) and harassing?

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Reply to "How do courts rule when one parent is overly controlling (BPD/NPD) and harassing?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What is the custody arrangement? Who has residential and legal custody? Does he have a diagnosed personality disorder?

Your ex wants to control every detail - should you have to do that - nope.. The problem with NOT putting it in is that it gives him total freedom to do completely as he pleases while the kids are with him without informing you of anything. He may get a babysitter / visitor he knows you wouldn't like just to get back at you etc...or he will take a week to reply to your email contact then say that you didn't want to set a reasonable reply time so he can reply as he pleases.

I would include clear visitation, holidays, transportation, and trips out of state. I have seen restrictions about who else can live in the home - when a parent is concerned about the character of people the other parent is exposing their children too.

Is there a reason why he is being vindictive? If you had an affair and are leaving him for another man that your kids will be around all the time then some of his 'demands' make more sense - coming from a place of pain rather than a simple desire to control.[/quote]

Those with narcissistic or borderline personality disorder don't need a reason other than they are not getting their way. My friend's ex was the one who left, yet he is trying to control every aspect.  He can't stand the fact that she isn't cow-towing to his every whim like she did during their marriage. Folks with NPD are a nightmare.[/quote]

Oh I know, I was just trying to figure out if he actually is BPD/NPD or if he is acting controlling in this situation for another reason? I wasn't sure if he had the diagnosis or if OP just is calling him that. Someone who has been completely betrayed can act a little irrational and controlling and temporary look like someone with a personality disorder. [/quote]

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