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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Sorry to be blunt, but can you relocate? Perhaps to the same area as one of the siblings, or just outside it (to the other side)?

They would likely be mad. You could remain calm and note that you were there at the home base a lot longer than anyone else, and circumstances have necessitated the move. Then just let what happens, happen.[/quote]

If I was the least favorite, and it was obvious, I would bail, OP.

When you favor one or more of your kids, they should inevitably be the caretaker - they reaped priceless benefits all their lives, while you are left with a therapy bill.  [/quote]

This!

I estranged myself from my parents at age 30, in part because I was at the time suicidal and couldn’t tolerate anymore of the verbal abuse and manipulation that I had endured my whole life - as well as many years of physical abuse and cruel bullying in early childhood. Meanwhile my elder brother was greatly favored, encouraged to bully me in childhood as well, given vastly more financial support through childhood and young adulthood, and made executor.

But when it came to somebody to call every single day with toxic rants and demands for attention and expectations of assistance with medical and other issues, that was on me. I could see the writing on the wall - my brother would drop in on holidays and birthdays and mom and pop days and I would be bearing the burdens and wiping their asses until they expired, likely after a long period of even more toxic abuse as they descended into dementia. And he would likely inherit almost everything despite my labor. No thanks! I felt very strongly that he who wore the golden child crown should be the one who bore the burdens of their care.

And yes, I’ve been in therapy on and off for years, I have all the health issues associated with a high ACE score, and I’ll probably still be feeling like a worthless piece of garbage who never should have been born well into my 80s, if I make it that far. Thanks mom and dad! [/quote]

Yeah...no. At some point you need to own your life and take responsibility for your feelings. You were right to ditch your toxic family, but now you have to love yourself. It's sometimes very hard to love yourself. If you spend the rest of your life depressed and insecure, that's not your family's fault.
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Thank you for sharing with us your total ignorance about how childhood trauma works, how it damages the brain and how no, it’s not possible to wipe it away and step cheerfully into the future. Only idiots think it is.[/quote]

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