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Reply to "My brother copies everything I do - but better"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What’s wrong with your brother doing “better” than you? There’s no rule that says younger siblings have to be no better or have to be worse than the oldest. You’re not “a failure” when he does better. That’s a rather extreme way to talk about yourself. [b]His successes don’t diminish any of yours[/b]. This is all about your competitive personality and how you think. Work on changing your thoughts; be happy for your brother and his family. Therapy can help you with that. It’s good for you and the whole extended family when he does well, too. He could be asking you for money for his rent and bills regularly —and his wife’s designer bag, and his kids’ tuition — that he never can repay. Would you prefer a deadbeat brother? [/quote] My family believes differently. [/quote] It may be really hard to swim against the tide, but as an adult, you can question how your parents did things and choose to think differently from your family of origin. You have your own kids — don’t you want them all to do well and feel good about themselves? If one does something exceptionally well, do you want the other(s) to feel badly about it? If they do feel badly, what should a parent do? What effect do you want your words or actions to have? It seems like you could benefit from some therapy.[/quote]
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