Reply to How do I communicate with someone who can’t?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b] I showed him the text and said “I asked you to get pasta shells. What happened?” [/b]

This doesn’t sound like great communication on your part either. You sound like you are his mother and he is your child. Even if you’re not doing it on purpose, who [i]does[/i] want to be spoken to as if they were stupid?[/quote]

So what should I say? I’m not asking rhetorically. How do I respond to this stuff?[/quote]
In this instance: You could have nipped it in the bud long before it got to the blow up thing. You say ha ha ha LOL oh wow you got both that’s funny I appreciate it—but I actually meant the seashell pasta! You know, be kind? He could have felt silly and apologized all on his own, but there wasn’t even space to do that. This is the biggest nothingburger to bring him into the proverbial principal’s office for.

But you’re right, once it has escalated to the point of no return there is nothing that you can really effectively respond with. The best way to disengage is to not even start.[/quote]

That feels like one person is always disengaging and releasing the other person from any responsibility. What am I missing? The DH basically does whatever he wants and the wife cleans up his messes? That’s a sucky solution for everyone but the DH.[/quote]
But in this instance the DH didn’t just do basically whatever he wants. DW gave him a task, and while he misinterpreted the task, he did it and made a good faith effort to fulfill her needs. This is not a mess to clean up. In fact, you can put either penne and rotini into pasta salad and the world will not end. Pick your battles, for heavens sake![/quote]

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