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[quote=Anonymous]OP, I feel for you. My parents and in-laws are all a 10-hour drive (or a plane ride) away, so help on a regular basis has never been feasible. I do feel jealous (this may not be the right word, exactly) when my friends with parents nearby have help when their kid is sick or school/camp/daycare is closed. Or even during the summer for a grandparent to take them to a daytime swim lesson or something, instead of having to schedule everything for the evenings or weekends. But, it is what it is.

More than that, I wish my kids could have the kind of close relationship with their grandparents that comes from proximity. I grew up 20 minutes from both sets of grandparents and I have such wonderful memories of our close relationship. They babysat us regularly, we went to brunch a couple times a month, just went to spend the afternoon at their house, they came to our games and recitals, etc. For my kids, the grandparents coming to visit is a whole big to-do or it's a vacation. While I think that definitely adds a level of special-ness to the experience, it isn't the everyday kind of relationship I had with my grandparents.

As far as help with childcare goes, DH and I hire a babysitter 3-4 nights a year to go out to dinner or a concert or something. We have done one overnight (our kids are 5 and 3) for a family wedding and were able to leave our kids with some friends. When our younger child was born, we left the older one with different friends so that DH could be in the hospital with me. We wouldn't ask our friends to watch our kids overnight just to take a weekend away, but we have been able to call in favors like that in a pinch for major events. My advice: Look for 2-3 babysitters to have in your phone for when you want a night out. If your kid is in daycare, plan a day that you and your husband both take off work and spend the day together while your kid is cared for in his usual daycare. When your son is a little older, try to schedule regular video calls with the grandparents so he can develop a close relationship with them, even if they can't be here.[/quote]

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