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Reply to "Women seem to despise even hypothetical In-laws"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b]Historically most in-law relationships have been tense, toxic and traumatic.[/b] This conditioned women to despise the idea of having to deal with any. What advice would you give young women to establish good relations without compromising their own interests?[/quote] I think that definition of "historical" is half the problem. Toxic and traumatic in particular are at the worst end of any relationship spectrum. Of all the people I know with in-laws, only a handful of them would describe those relationships as toxic and traumatic. Before you get married, get on the same page with your fiancé and spend some time talking about how you'll handle hypotetical situations and what each of you expect of the other in regards to your families. Present a united front with both sets of parents from the moment you become a unit. Don't throw each other under the proverbial bus. From day 1, don't pick up the rope for your spouse. Don't position yourself as the sole decision maker for your new family. That makes it too easy for either IL to "blame" the partner when they don't like decisions. And don't sweat the small stuff. [/quote]
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