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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think I'd try to validate the kids' feeling without confirming it. Because you don't really know how she feels. You could say "ah, that doesn't feel good does it?" or "do you want to talk about what makes you feel that way?"

And then after they get their thoughts out, I think i'd say some version of "compare and despair." If they want a closer relationship with grandma, you can talk about ways they can reach out to her (letters, email, facetime, invitations to different things). But the feeling of someone getting "more" than you is different from the feeling of wanting "more" from the giver, if that makes sense. I guess I'd try to find out if they want more with grandma or if they're just noticing a disparity and feeling slighted.[/quote]

Op here. Thank you, for the thoughtful response. I think DC used to want more time with Grandma, but it's probably transitioning more into noticing the disparity and unsure of why this is happening. I've generally been saying what you suggested saying, but it hasn't really gotten us anywhere because DC just keeps giving (very valid) examples. And then it seems like DC just spirals if that makes sense?[/quote]

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