Reply to Splitting (people good/bad) and seeing loved ones as bad..How common with Alzheimers?

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Reply to "Splitting (people good/bad) and seeing loved ones as bad..How common with Alzheimers?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My mom is also like that.  She has aphasia and has trouble communicating, especially when she is tired, anxious or frustrated which is most of the time.  She’ll blame me, tell me she only has problems talking when I’m around (not true at all) and she can be nasty.  She’s balled up her fists and me, she’s gotten in my face a screamed.  She’s in assisted living but I’m her only person, my brother lives across the country and visits every year or two.  I’ve had to set some firm boundaries.  When I’m visiting her (twice a week week, every week) and she starts getting nasty I leave.  It’s so hard.  [/quote]

I physically can no longer do this and I am impressed with how you can. My body cannot take anymore anger outbursts/blame/threats from her even if I leave as soon as it happens. I reached my limit.[/quote]

I am asking this out of curiosity, not trying to be insensitive: If your mom gets so worked up when you visit, are the visits even good for her?  I understand that showing up for her sends a message to her caregivers that you are keeping an eye on things, but the rest of it sounds like self-flagellation for you and stressful for her due to her response to you.  Have you considered cutting way back on visits?[/quote]

OP here. Thanks. I don't find this insensitive. I agree with you.[/quote]

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