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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My marriage counselor, who was quoted in the Washingtonian, told me and my long- time spouse, “This marriage is dead” followed by “who is going to move out?” I was shocked. 2 years later— he was correct!

He knew something from someone!  Go figure.

OP: Start doing what YOU WANT

[/quote]

How long did it take for your counselor to reach this conclusion?  Like how many sessions?

I believe that if a counselor told me this after talking to both me and my spouse for an extensive period, I would be outta here faster than a bat out of hell.  I am hoping to repair the marriage primarily for the sake of my children, and because DH and I work together relatively well and have built a fairly nice life.  We are also actively having sex a lot, because for a long time we had a dead bedroom (I was the partner who wanted sex).

So the counselor initially seemed really positive and said “everything is fixable!”  But to me everything is not “fixable.”  I find her positivity almost a little off putting.  I just find her off putting I guess.  In many ways my love for him is gone.  And he has always said he wanted to have a “fresh start” and then returned to the exact dynamic.  She loved his language and uses the term “fresh start,” now with therapy!  I guess I sort of hated that she did that when I told her how much I hated all the fake “fresh starts” in our marriage.  We may just be two people who don’t connect.  But she’s not posting about how much she hates clients on Instagram or something ridiculous, it’s just bugging me.  I will give it one more chance and see how I feel next week.  [/quote]

It seemed like 3 or so months. I learned little. I should have been working on myself that entire time. I found therapy to be another burden I didn’t have time for.  We spent a lot of the time talking about his growing up gay in the South. I learned a lot about the therapist but I was lost in my morass!  It might’ve been me deflecting… haha i [/quote]

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