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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I was a major nerd (valedictorian) in high school, but was in a rural town. All the mean girls followed the same arc: pretty, athletic, and mean in high school; married to their high school sweetheart (jock) right after school; 3-4 kids by our 10 year reunion, and fat and frumpy as hell. On the other hand, I have a great life and awesome DH and a career that's well-paid and respected in DC (and 1 DD who is the light of my life).

When I go back to my hometown I actually feel bad for the former mean girls. They are really beaten down and their dreams have evaporated in the day-to-day stress of barely scraping by. I certainly don't feel a sense of schadenfreude, even though I could. I just feel lucky I had the brains to get out of there and do something with my life. It sounds like the mean girls in your hometown were higher SES and better educated than the mean girls in my hometown, but still, why are you bitter toward them still?

I think you need to focus on your happiness and what is fulfilling to you. Then go out and pursue it. Sounds like what you envied about those girls wasn't their looks or money, but rather their ability to focus on what they wanted and get it (careers and athletic achievements, for example). Use your unresolved feelings to get motivated about meeting and exceeding your goals for your own life. You'll forget they ever existed![/quote]

I am happy you overcame the problems in your past.  Some of us gave up.  We were beat down everyplace we went (home, school, etc).  If you let a child know they are worthless, they will prove you right. Some of us gave up.
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That is so very sad. I think it's a lesson to us to give our daughters our support and encourage them to find what they are good at. [/quote]

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