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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I assume you’re talking really only about domestic adoption where birth parents would have any say, so my own experience as an international adoptive parent isn’t relevant, BUT I will say that I’m also an international, transracial adult adoptee and it is nice, for once, to not be a conspicuous family (some of my kids were adopted from the same country I was). [/quote]

re: "conspicuous family" discomfort: I'm a birth mother who placed a child with a family that did not look like us. Not interracial or international, but different hair color, height, features. Fast forward to now, after we've spoken at length about the experience of them being adopted, & that was something that created dissonance for this adoptee (now adult) growing up in their adoptive family. I hadn't really considered it to be a strong criteria when choosing the family but it had a big impact on adoptee growing up. I think the constant stream of Qs from strangers & not feeling similar (both body type, coloring, & mannerisms) was hard.[/quote]

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