Reply to Are posters here really this spineless, or just bidding for attention on DCUM?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The issue is family dysfunction. In health families you can have boundaries and communicate without setting off an explosion. In dysfunctional families you have to try 42 approaches just to say "No Karen, that doesn't work for me!"[/quote]

Ding ding ding, we have a winner[/quote]

Yep. I used to post here a lot. We finally had enough of our own life stressors we had to set boundaries firmly and let the chips fall as they may. All heck broke lose, but by then we were so fed up with the BS we were prepared to lose them. They gave us silent treatment and we enjoyed the much needed break. When they were ready to speak to us again and insisted their way or the highway, we chose the highway. In dysfunctional families you risk estrangement by setting and keeping boundaries. You have to have tried every possible permutation and be so fed up with the poor behavior that if setting boundaries gets you ousted, you would find that a relief over playing these games any longer. There are many estrangements in my family and my husband's family and each and every one was set off by a cyclebreaker setting a boundary and not giving in to tantrums. If you look at all us black sheep, we are happily married and we were the people pleasers who finally stopped pleasing. If you look at those who are still allowed in the family, most are divorced or in unhappy marriages, replaying drama over drama. The only thing that brings them together is complaining about black sheep.[/quote]

Awesome, and congratulations, PP. That is amazing that you took a stand for your own well-being. Good for you. [/quote]

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